The pre-Olympics silly season is upon us, meaning that lame PRs who haven’t got any real news to punt at the media at last have a chance of getting some coverage for their short-changed clients, before everything is wiped out by Ennis (either fat or scrawny depending on your point of view) and Bolt (rather more fetching).
So we’re in full swing at Puff & Fluff pumping out surveys (one in 10 shoppers thinks beer counts towards your five-a-day), weather stories (soggy Britain stripped bare by giant slugs) and celebollocks (Macy Gray spotted sipping new soft drink). Our brewery, slug pellet and coconut water clients have been well served.
None as successfully as our salt brand (work it out, there aren’t that many), which believes that we were responsible for the Mail story suggesting cutting salt could be bad for the heart. Of course, it was as much a surprise to us as it was to them, but we still claimed the credit. Miranda said it was a novelty to see something true “amid the usual psychotic Mail nonsense” but then she’s been a bit funny since she came back from the Latitude festival, having rather overdosed on peace and love.
One thing I’ll never have too much of is ale. By which I mean: I won’t have any at all. I know it’s supposed to be on trend, and normally that would be enough, but anything that appeals exclusively to men called Colin, some of whom have worn the same tank top since 1974, is a style step too far for me.
Meanwhile, glad to see 99p Stores is creating 3,000 new jobs. Presumably, like their pack sizes, they’ll be very similar to proper jobs, but just a little bit smaller.
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