Why on earth would grocers want to self-sabotage with a change to imperial measures?

The UK could be about to join an elite group. That is, the countries that use imperial units as their official or dominant system of weight, height, temperature and whatnot.

They are the US, Liberia and Myanmar, a trio that might become a quartet if Boris Johnson has his way. He’s expected on Friday to capitalise on patriotic fervour amid the Platinum Jubilee by announcing a return to dominance for pounds, ounces et al – with retail at the heart of the plan.

The intention is to bring “a bit of our national culture and heritage back onto the shop shelf”, Conservative MP Chris Philp told Sky News this morning. His colleague Mark Francois, meanwhile, raved on BBC TV about the “freedom of choice” Johnson’s plan would offer “a market trader or Sainsbury’s”.

Details so far are vague and subject to a government consultation, which is expected to “look at where it makes sense to incorporate or switch to imperial measurements such as feet and yards, and pints and gallons, with traders likely to be free to choose which they use” ITV reported.

Nevertheless, Brexiters are already giddy with the excitement about the prospect of the PM’s announcement – especially those convinced that bonkers Brussels busybodies banned bendy bananas being sold by the pound.

In reality, of course, an EU regulation that came into force in 2000 simply means use of metric units is a legal requirement for the sale by weight or measure of fresh produce. Pricing in pounds and ounces alongside is perfectly lawful (and so is selling bendy bananas), despite what so-called metric martyrs might insist.

For many other people, ‘demetricification’ of shopping missions makes little sense. It’s a “ludicrous suggestion” according to Green Party peer Jenny Jones. For Labour’s Angela Eagle, bringing back imperial units is “pathetic” and merely a bid to “weaponise nostalgia”.

Even some Tory MPs have spoken out against the move. Alicia Kearns and Tobias Ellwood, for instance, described it respectively as “a nonsense” and “far from the inspirational, visionary progressive thinking that we require”.

The UK’s leading grocers, however, have remained noticeably silent on the matter – presumably because they’ve got better things to do, such as preparing for a bumper bank holiday while also addressing supply shortages, a cost of living crisis, an obesity epidemic and demand for transparency on sustainability.

Even if they had nothing better to do, it’s very unlikely the mults would opt to update their shelf-edge labels and marketing material to imperial. That would be costly, time-consuming and, let’s face it, trivial.

Plus, the fact the UK is officially metric while everyday life already involves plenty of imperial units, from pints of milk to miles per hour, can be perplexing enough already for some people.

That’s almost certainly the case for young and, indeed, future shoppers. Not only are they raised on metric, they’re the people retailers and brands seem keenest to attract. Confusing them further with ounces, pounds, quarts and bushels would be practically self-sabotage.