I return to the office with a spring in my step this week ­ I have realised that I am not the oldest person in grocery. Who is? Look no further than the Co-op. Never mind the thrusting executives of CWS and United Norwest, most of those attending Congress last weekend looked like they'd been diverted from a Darby and Joan whist drive. Comfortable shoes a go-go, they sat in serried ranks to hear about the crisis of the ever-ageing membership to be told that, in effect, they would not be "allowed to die" by the Co-op's union. Mmm. I'm wondering how the Co-op will stop the hands of time to save its increasingly wrinkly members. And the Co-op's head office ­ New Century House in Manchester's throbbing centre ­ epitomised the '60s in such a remarkable way, I was almost compelled to whip out my sleeveless afghan and regrow my long-since shorn beard. I reckon they could make a fortune hiring out their boardroom ­ complete with lighting dis-play, 13th floor views and amphitheatre-style layout with big squashy seats ­ as a set for one of those '60s remakes. I just wonder what they could call it. No comfy seats at Hampden Park for the Tennent's Scottish Cup Final between Rangers and Aberdeen. But all Tennent's guests were seated well before kick-off ­ with plenty of in-yer-face Tennent's branding in the middle of the pitch and adorning the cheerleaders ­ just so no one attending the game was left in any doubt who the sponsor was. Interesting to note that the swearing ban imposed on Leicester City fans hasn't yet reached north of the border. {{COUNTERPOINT }}

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