Tim Orrell, MD of Golley Retail, on Porsches, spreadsheets and his ‘cricket career’


What was your first-ever job? I worked as a voucher clerk in a small agency checking classified ads in newspapers. Having gone into marketing expecting Porsches, glamour and long lunches this was a well-placed early "get over yourself".

What was your worst job interview? I went for an interview with a notable agency and was shocked at how regally I was treated. I sat with the chairman who pushed aside my CV and asked me about my batting average. It became apparent that he thought I was the cricketer Tim Orrell and that I would be a great addition to his company and cricket team. I am possibly the worst cricketer in the world so came clean immediately I was escorted from the building.

What was the first music single you bought? I bought New Life by Depeche Mode in summer 1981. That's the official, cool and not at all embarrassing version.

How do you describe your job to your mates? I look after marketing for many of the products in your weekly shopping basket and some of the shops you buy them in.

What is the most rewarding part of your job? My team they are the best in the business.

What is the least rewarding part? I hate spreadsheets! I know it's all very necessary I just wish Microsoft could add a more human approach.

What is your motto in life? "Do, or do not, there is no try." Yoda has all the best lines even if they are a bit grammatically challenged.

What's your nickname? I have lots Papa Golley, Timbolina, Silverback, Wids Timmay, Silver Fox, Oi fatty.

If you were allowed one dream perk what would it be? I'd love a Porsche. After all I did start out in marketing because I wanted one.

What's your favourite movie and why? It has to be Star Wars the first three or should that be the last three as I'm not as keen on all that Jar Jar Binks nonsense.

Do you have any phobias? I hate snakes, I can't even watch them on TV. I also have a deep dislike of Noel Edmonds.

If you could pick a celebrity to join your staff who would it be and why? Eddie Izzard is an inspiration: funny and intelligent.

If you could change one thing in grocery what would it be? I wish we were all less 'marketingy' and more plain in our communication.

What animal best reflects your personality and why? I am without doubt a marmot a fat ground squirrel, a bit like a crap land beaver with a greying coat.

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